


Commie's Bookshelf Says Trans Rights

by UndervaluedAgent



Category: The Centricide (Webseries)
Genre: Arguing, Buddy this is about throwing bookshelves, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Don't expect too much, Gen, Humor, Misgendering, Non-Graphic Violence, Nonbinary Character, Reconciliation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:40:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23419879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UndervaluedAgent/pseuds/UndervaluedAgent
Summary: Happy trans visibility day! Here's a fic about Ancom throwing a bookshelf at Nazi after he misgenders quem too many times!
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Comments: 33
Kudos: 91





	Commie's Bookshelf Says Trans Rights

"You look tired, Nazi," Ancap said as Nazi walked in the kitchen at 10 a.m.

"Yeah, no kidding. Ancom, that little degenerate, was keeping me up last night," Nazi spat bitterly.

A smirk spread across Ancap's face. "Oh, qui was? Do tell me more~" he winked, though Nazi couldn't see it underneath his shades.

"Ugh, so what that brat did was---" the meaning of what Ancap said hit Nazi. "NOT LIKE THAT, YOU FUCKING DEGENERATE!" Nazi shrieked, while Ancap burst out laughing.

"Ohohohoho, someone's a bit shy." he winked under his shades again. "Your secret's safe with me."

"You know exactly what I meant, you perverted scum. So, anyways, what Ancom actually did was: he barged into my room at two in the morning and started listing the bad things that could come of an ethnostate, which you'd think would be a short list, but---"

At that moment, Ancom walked in. "NAZI! I AM SICK AND TIRED OF YOU MISGENDERING ME! FOR THE LAST TIME, MY PRONOUNS ARE QUI/QUEM!"

Nazi shook his head. "I refuse to call you those ridiculous pronouns. You are not a qui/quem or whatever. You are a man. Simple as that."

Ancom seemed to flinch at that statement, and quis eyes began to well up. "NO! I'M NOT A MAN. I'm nonbinary. C-can you please just respect that? Until we're out of this situation?"

Nazi seemed to ponder it for a moment. He needed to stamp out the degeneracy that had been implemented in Ancom by LGTBQWDIBWFYYERYRCYI or whatever the hell the acronym was at that point. He did feel genuinely sorry for those infected, as he had been there before (albeit with his sexuality instead of gender). But luckily, that was gone now. Sure, he still had the occasional degenerate thought here and there, but it was very rare, so he considered himself good. On the other hand, was Ancom _really_ his problem? He could just do nothing about it and have some peace for once.

Ancap startled him by saying, "Come on, just use quis pronouns. I just want a little peace in this house. After all, it is my house."

Nazi wanted to say yes. He wanted some peace. But he had to make sure the degeneracy didn't flourish. "No. I will not use qui/quem pronouns on him."

Ancom smacked the counter and screamed, "THAT'S IT!" and ran down the hallway. Within a few seconds, qui came back holding a bookshelf that Commie had moved in, though he still needed to put some books in it. Ancom screeched incomprehensibly and heaved the bookshelf at Nazi, knocking him over.

"Ohohohohohoooolllllyyyy shit," Ancap said as the bookshelf hit the ground and cracked.

"THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR BEING A GODDAMN BIGOT!" Ancom screamed, though there was pain in quis voice.

"Ugh..." Nazi groaned, "what were you hoping to accomplish with that..."

"I just want you to respect my fucking pronouns, but you had to be so intolerant! It hurts when you use he/him, you know? It makes me feel...wrong." Ancom's voice cracked at the end of quis statement.

Nazi looked thoughtful for a few moments. His gaze softened, and he looked at Ancom. "Listen, I understand that it might suck if you feel a certain way, but those around you don't validate it. But you know what hurts more?"

"...What?" Ancom asked.

"Getting hit with a FUCKING BOOKSHELF!"

"No SHIT, Nazi, that was the POINT!"

The two ideologies started to yell at each other, and Ancap was left to stand there wondering how the hell _anyone_ managed to sleep last night if Nazi and Ancom had been arguing.

The arguing continued for a few more minutes until Ancap heard Commie walk through the door (he could tell by the sound of the boots, alongside the fact that there was no one else it could be). Ancap couldn't help but feel excited. Let's see how he reacts to his _own_ property being taken and "redistributed."

"OH, COMMIEEEE~!" Ancap shouted.

Commie wondered what the hell had happened to make _Ancap_ of all people call for him. "Vhat happened, kulak?" he barked.

"Ancom 'redistributed' your property to quemself and used it as a weapon! Come see what qui did to it!"

Commie sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. _What happened this time. What made Anarkitty so violent this time._ When he came into the kitchen, he saw his bookshelf snapped on the floor and Anarkitty arguing with Nazi. _Same shenanigans as usual._

Commie sighed, "Anarkitty. Nazi. Settle down. Bookshelf can be fixed, and use as an improvised veapon is impressive---" he was cut off as Ancap gasped loudly.

"Y-you don't care---but qui wrecked your property??" Ancap said.

"Bookshelf was to be used by the people anyways!"

"But how do you expect to..." Ancap started rambling about economic theory, which Commie continuously tried to refute and debate him on.

Meanwhile, Ancom took some deep breaths, then qui turned to Nazi. "Okay, I think now's as good of a time as any to try and come to a truce. Look, if you respect my pronouns, then I won't throw bookshelves at you anymore, okay? Deal?"

Nazi wanted to say no. He wanted to stand by his principles. But being completely honest, he was tired of this, and getting hit with a bookshelf had taken a lot out of him.

"Fine. And I'll start now."

Ancom felt a grin spreading underneath quis mask.

"Commie? Hey, since Ancom was the one who threw the bookshelf and broke it in the first place, don't you think qui should be the one to fix it?"

Ancom wanted to be mad about this, but qui wasn't. Qui felt the euphoria rising in quem. Ancom didn't care if qui had to fix a bookshelf. It was worth it to not feel wrong anymore. It was absolutely worth it.

**Author's Note:**

> I wish I could endorse trying this at home, but I don't want to be responsible for anyone getting McNuked because they violated the NAP or anything similar.
> 
> Also, u/clowntoddhoward on Reddit made art of this: https://www.reddit.com/r/Jreg/comments/g7ewg9/bookshelf_says_trans_rights/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share


End file.
